Gospel-Centered Families (1/4)

Transformed Home

By Pastor Dan Williams, February 05, 2023

— Building the home God freed you to have —

Ephesians 6:1–4 (NLT) Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do. 2 “Honor your father and mother.” This is the first commandment with a promise: 3 If you honor your father and mother, “things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.” 4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.


Big Idea

The gospel transforms the purpose of my home: My family can show how compelling it is to live under God’s reign of love.

1. Show that God’s rule is .

Ephesians 6:1–3 (NLT) Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do. 2 “Honor your father and mother.” This is the first commandment with a promise: 3 If you honor your father and mother, “things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.” Deuteronomy 5:32–33 (NLT)

“The family is the place where you learn to submit to authority instead of living for yourself.” ~ Tim Chester

”Obeying parents is willing submission to authority without delay, without excuse and without challenge”. ~ Paul Tripp

  • Discipline willful disobedience & rebellion. ( 5C’s)
    • Clarification — expectations
    • Correction — expectation redirection & reminders
    • Consequences — for willful disobedience & rebellion (operating in own authority)
    • Contrition — loving restoration & humble exploration of God-given parental authority and willingness to confess & repent for mistakes
    • Coaching — addressing & challenging heart motivations & restoration. Help your child discover they’re not the center of the world.
  • Parents are designed to model God’s good, liberating, just rule.

2. Show that God’s rule is .

Vv 2-3 “Honor your father and mother.” This is the first commandment with a promise: 3 If you honor your father and mother, “things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.”

  • When you, an adult child, honor your parents, especially when it’s undeserved, it shows God’s rule is gracious.

Luke 15 (NLT)

  • God is a gracious Father who welcomes wayward children.

V4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.

  • Our job is to show them what our Father in heaven is like.

CONTINUING THE CONVERSATION

1. What do you think about this idea: the family is the primary place for training children to submit to authority.

a. Have you noticed what happens to people who don’t learn to live under authority? (How they cope in society (school, work, officials, the police…How they relate to God?)

2. PARENTS

a. Think about the sort of things you say to your children (or your parents said to you) as you discipline them.

i. Could you use this line with your children/grandchildren?

1. “God has placed you under my authority to teach you to live under His authority”?

b. Can you see why allowing children to “obey” with delay, excuse, or challenge is really just willful disobedience?

c. How might it help you to think of your parental role as “showing them what our gracious Father in heaven is like” ?

3. ADULT CHILDREN: What is so challenging about “honoring your mother & father” (especially if you think they don’t deserve it)?


Grow On Your Own

“Gospel-Centered Family | Becoming the parents God wants you to be” © Tim Chester and Ed Moll/The Good Book Company, 2010. Excerpts From Gospel-Centered Family, Tim Chester